Staying Foolish !

Stupid, Foolish and Crazy are some of the words people generally associate with me. I have to admit that they must be right as well, especially when these attributes are spelled out by people who know me for quite some time - parents, relatives and friends. I myself occasionally feel these are the best words to describe myself... the only addition I would have made being 'Lazy'.

Because of all this I rarely argue on this point and rather enjoy the advantages of such labeling. Once you get out of the stereotype of 'normal human being', life becomes much more interesting. You don't have a great image to live up to and hence no need for constant reinvention of your own self! It also reduces a lot of what you generally call 'peer pressure', the need to stand at par with the rest of the pack. Anything you do, even the outright shocking of things, get overlooked and sidelined with the remark 'he's always been like that.. don't pay attention'. Though such labeling might prima facie sound like a bondage and burden, in reality it is the most liberating of experiences. Something like they said in 'Fear & Loathing in Las Vegas'- he who makes a beast of himself gets rid of the pain of being a man!

I am called foolish mostly because of the seemingly impossible and impractical ideas I have about life. If you want to live life a certain way, without breaking the moral code of the society, why should others fret about it? When I tell people that I don't watch television or I don't own a vehicle, the immediate conclusion is that I must be stupid! Any deviation from the so called 'normal' behavior is always termed as perversion and that is understandable.

Staying foolish helps you face life at your own terms. You don't have to constantly adapt to someone else's idea of life and not recognize yourself in the mirror one fine day. Nothing's worth more, than leading life by one's own convictions. But the difficult part is to make others understand your way of living. I got a lesson on this from a dear friend of mine. She was giving a lecture on relationships, after another girl told me that I am worse than a Eunuch and is totally unfit to take up responsibilities. She told me 'At some point in life, every girl wants a certain kind of love, a certain kind of life.. something stable and secure and dependable. They don't want an unguided, uncontrolled missile, which travels dangerously and might explode anytime'. I shamelessly accepted the argument and said 'That is definitely impressive'!

I have been fooled or cheated a couple of times by people whom I trusted the most. I trust everyone till they prove otherwise, as I believe that everyone is basically good. It is also the easiest way to approach life, as you don't have to devise preemptive strategies against everyone you see around. But occasionally I ended up giving my time and energy, to worthless people, that did nothing for me but make me regret ever trusting them, and accepting them into my life. But then that is all right... shit happens all the time.

What if I am rejected and kicked a few times, I am still in love!